
We have all been there at one point in our lives; a tragic earth-shattering breakup. Then, your head begins to fill with negative thoughts and emotions. You start to feel dizzy. You can not catch your breath. It is a terrible feeling to have and a shitty ordeal to go through. Never fear; love can be found again. I believe there is a person out there made for each of us, our twin flame. Twin flames, also called “mirror souls,” are terms used to describe a relationship ideology rooted in new-age spiritualism. The concept has seen increased popularity in recent times. It promotes the idea of an intense soul connection between two people thought to be each other’s half. I will talk more about twin flames in a later post.
Regardless of the type of relationship, it still hurts the same. A breakup can be one of the most difficult things anyone can go through. Each heartbreak takes a piece of you with it. Not only does it affect you emotionally, but also mentally. You may experience sadness, security, self-esteem, role identity, and sexuality. The increase in anxiety and sadness can also lead to feelings of panic, obsession, and depression. If untreated, this can also bring up issues of obsessive-compulsiveness like checking in or stalking your ex’s social media accounts.
In the event the breakup starts affecting your mental health, it’s time to start doing something about it. This is where building and putting your pieces back together comes into play. You won’t feel whole overnight or even days, weeks, or months from now, but you will be a step closer to being you again and finding yourself. How can you successfully cope with a breakup? Well, continue reading below for helpful ways to cope with a break-up and eventually find love again.
I”m a huge believer and practicioner of manifesting and using the power of attraction to basically redesign my life and reality. Anyone can do it. Learn more here.
1. Practice Selfcare

I can’t begin to describe how important self-care really is, not only after a breakup but for everyday life in general. So many people neglect their own well-being, especially in relationships. We get so caught up in everyday life and matters of the heart that we may or may not neglect our personal needs. Pamper yourself. Start exercising. Get healthier not only physically but also mentally and emotionally. A good way to do this is by exercising at least 3 times a week, and meditating in the mornings when you wake up and at night before you go to sleep. Fix the mind and fix the body.
2. Why Didn’t it Work?

What was the cause of your breakup? An issue for me was my lack of communication. For this step to work, you have to not only recognize why your relationship didn’t work, but you must also work to fix the issue because 9 times out of 10, it’ll be an issue in your next relationship. This can be one of the hardest things to do. Think about it, who wants to focus on their flaws? I don’t know about you, but that doesn’t seem fun to me at all. This step is so important though. Relearn yourself. Over the years, you’ve built up a social conditioning of how you should think, act, live, etc. Find yourself during this stage. Dive into the root issues for your break up and work on those issues. Take responsibility also. I know for a fact I can be a hard man to deal with at times, and I also may tend to push the people I care about away simply because I feel like I cause more issues than solutions, so I keep to myself. Well, this isn’t good, nor is it healthy for a successful relationship, and I’ve lost amazing partners along the way due to this issue.
3. Incorporate the Buddy System

We all have that one friend who keeps you sane or drives you crazy, preferably the latter. Incorporating a buddy system during a breakup can save you additional heartbreak. A buddy can hold you accountable when you’re feeling flighty and want to contact your ex. Ideally, instead of sending that shameful, ” I miss you” text, call your buddy instead to talk you off the cliff. Make sure this person is patient for starters and a great oral communicator.
4. Create a Music Playlist

I don’t know about you, but music for me is soothing but also healing. Research shows that listening to sad or inspirational music can help you begin to feel joy and hope again. Sad music can promote your feelings of empathy and allows you to connect with others again. I do this all the time by creating a playlist.
5. Massages Do Wonder

This is obviously a win-win in my book. People tend to forget how connected our minds, bodies, and souls are. The mental affects the physical. The physical can affect the mind. And they both can affect you spiritually. Relieve yourself from that physical stress and go get a massage. Massages improve your overall blood circulation. A fantastic massage can cleanse your congested areas, making it easier for the heart to get the blood flowing properly so new oxygen-rich blood can move throughout your system smoothly.
6. Re-Evaluation

Even though breakups fucking suck, they can also be a great time for self-reflection and re-evaluating one’s wants, needs and etc. This is the perfect time to redefine yourself like the mighty phoenix. Make a decision on what kind of partner you’d want to be and establish habits that will help you reach this ideal version of yourself. For example, I want to be the kind of partner that is patient and communicative. What I’ve started doing is practicing mindfulness. Be present and don’t dwell on what is, but strive for better. This is also the time to re-evaluate your relationship goals as well.
Who do you want as a partner? What do you want or need from your relationships? These are all important questions you should be asking yourself. If you need extra help, don’t be afraid to reach out to a close friend, family member, or therapist as well. Help them keep you accountable as you navigate this stage of self-reflection and re-evaluation. During this stage, it’s easy to fall into the trap of jumping back into another relationship. Don’t. You need this time to figure your shit out so you can live your best life and find someone who not only pushes you but also blesses your life as well. This is can be found through self-reflection. This stage will be the turning point or your downfall, so use this time wisely in a positive manner. Take up new hobbies. Travel. Explore. Experience. And above all else, stay true to yourself.
Finding Love After a Breakup

I don’t know about you, but I hate being uncomfortable in any situation. Emotional discomfort is a huge issue for me. This can also be a good thing. When dealing with everything that comes with a breakup you’ve felt it all. This makes you a very exceptional human being because it signifies you openly let your guard down to let someone else in. You connected with this person, and gave them a part of you, only for it to end in flames. It sucks when I put it like that, I know, but you can also use this power to create a better outcome in the future. If you are aware of why your relationship ended, and what you could’ve done differently, you’re already far ahead of the pack in the relationship sector. A breakup can help you learn how to pick better partners for yourself while also redefining and improving your boundaries. It’s ok to want what you want.
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People tend to shy away from doing dirty work. And I’m not talking about the actual deed of doing the breakup, but learning from the breakup itself. Even though most breakups are shitty that doesn’t mean that they are bad and that ending the relationship was a mistake. The relationship ended for a reason. That reason is also known. You need the muck of past relationships for your personal growth. This tends to be a very eye-opening experience when done correctly. Me, I”m currently going through a breakup as we speak. Awkward much?
Don’t get me wrong, I love my partner, but are we good together? No, at least not in the things that matter to us the most. So, with the ending of my relationship, I’m dealing with a slew of raw emotions, heartbreak, confusion, anger, and so much more. I am also hopeful though because I do know that I am a good guy, I just got issues. I do hope this information was helpful! Remember, take care of yourself and take it one day at a time. It gets better.
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